The Persona post is being delayed not because I'm a slacker (it's actually
mostly done) but because I realized something: I keep saying nice things in my reviews lately.
Like, I haven't been bitching about anime nearly enough, and it's not like
there's a shortage of stuff I dislike in what I've watched. So I will now make up for that by...well, you'll see.
Itsuka Tenma no Kuro Usagi Anime Review
All right, so you have this dude Taito. And lately he has all these dreams about a girl with really wacky hair (it's
pink and blue and would be right at home in Shiki with all the other
wtf-hair), who talks about giving him her “poison”. Or something.
Sometimes he imagines something crazy, is he hearing her while he's awake?
No way. Then he survives an accident that really should kill him and goes
WHOA NOW. I don't even know. Well it turns out that he met the chick, whose name is Himea, when he was
like 6. And she fell in love with him when they'd known each other for like a whole
hour it looked like.
Of course she was a “vampire” (ha....yeah, we'll get back to that) and she
put a “curse” on him so he can always stay with her. Which is to say, he's like sort of a vampire too, only not really.
Don't ask.
She was stolen by this other dude and then he meets her again years later
blah blah and they're still totally in love blah blah blah. We've heard this story before. It's not a goddamn story. It's...no one knows what this is.
The Characters: Itsuka Tenma no Kuro Usagi
KILL THEM ALL. Or at least the main two. First of all, Himea. Let's talk about Himea. For one, her hair SPARKLES.
We've been through this before with a book that is for some reason
famous...Vampires. Do not. Sparkle. Period.
Second of all, if she is a vampire, will someone please explain to me WHY
she can go in the sunlight? WHY she exhibits none of the normal vampire weaknesses? WHY she is more like, I don't know, a witch or something (sadly not a
Madoka-style Witch...) than a vampire and they can't just call her the right
thing? Oh, and why she is one of the most annoying little bitches I have ever laid
eyes on? (And that's saying something. I watched Dog Days, remember?).
And Taito. Oh, Taito. He's in love with Himea for no apparent reason.
Then again, she's in love with him for no apparent reason as well.
Apparently since Himea put her poison in him (why does that sound like
reverse-pregnancy whenever I say it?) he can die six times a day and it's
totally cool, but the seventh time he's screwed.
How has this ever applied to vampires? It just...it just no. He's also
stupid, but I can't complain about that as much because let's be honest: a
lot of anime guys are pretty stupid.
The other characters were easier to stomach. You had Gekkou, the guy who
abducted Himea earlier, and he's a jerk, but jerks are way more interesting
than guys like Taito. And Gekkou has like...a servanty chick named Mirai, who is annoying but
ADORABLE. Mostly annoying.
Then there's this teacher guy, who just looks like the most trustworthy
person on the planet: Yeah, I'm full of it.
The Beach: I want someone to explain this to me. I understand that the Beach
Episode is tradition in any anime with a lot of girls.
I understand that we clearly have to see these girls in their bathing suits
at some point and you know, normally I wouldn't complain because...y'know, I
take no issue seeing girls in bathing suits. (Especially if that girl is
Mami Tomoe...that would have been fantastic).
However, when your main female protagonist who needs to be punched in the
throat is a VAMPIRE, she should not be going to the mother-effing BEACH. She should in fact be staying as far away from the beach as humanly
possible. Grahhhhh.
Conclusion?
Okay. I did a post like two or three episodes into the series saying it made
me want to stab myself in the eye, right? Okay... At the end of the day, it
still made me want to stab myself in the eye. Or gouge my eyes out of my skull. Or destroy my ears so I could never hear
it again. All perfectly reasonable options.
I can't come up with a single reason you should watch this series. It had annoying characters. It had NO plot...by which I mean it had a few mini-plots, nothing
overarching, which sometimes is totally cool (like I just watched Natsume
Yuujinchou and it was faaaaaaaaantastic), but in Itsuka Tenma, the
mini-plots were all so totally FAILtastic that it made the whole thing cause
me to almost bash my head against the wall.
It had the teacher who looked suspicious and was kind of an ass but not
really and like...well let's just say that one was pulled off much, MUCH
better by the teacher who actually WAS an ass back in Yumekui Merry.
You know, this guy, who at the time of this screen shot is kicking the crap
out of one of his students: But there was nothing good here. Nothing.
My rating: 1/10
Sometimes there's anime where I celebrate the final episode being released
just because it means that in about twenty minutes, I never have to watch it
again. This is one of those series.
Fan Art: Itsuka Tenma no Kuro Usagi
Itsuka Tenma no Kuro Usagi | |
Episodes | 12 |
---|---|
Genre | Comedy, Ecchi, Romance, Shonen (how, MAL, how?), Supernatural |
Aired | July 9, 2011 to September 24, 2011 |
Directed by | Takashi Yamamoto |
Producers | Zexcs |
Opening Theme | Once by Hitomi Harada |
Closing Theme | Utsusemi by Akiko Shikata / Sparkling Kiss by Iori Nomizu / Strawberry Eyes by Megumi Takamoto |
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